Sway

careless twists and turns would cause some serious injury. just like a broken friendship. shake your booty but watch where i'm going. poop out your ass and i'll deflate it for all i care, thinking about stepping into my area? think again, trespassing is a crime. but enough about that, sway with our newdresses and tap with our shoes. let's just say how lucky we are we got each other but lets just stop and think. did we really mean that? beneath the fake smiles and plastic i love yous lies a wonderful world of lies and critcs.

//"i dont really like her when we're alone"//"who would you rather hang with? a ditz? or an immature friend?"//"she's too full of herself"//"she really is a queen bee!"//"is she really cheap?"//"she's so annoying!"//"she ditches me all the time"//

a stab on each back and blood dripping down our cotton white blouse as we walk down the hallway with stories to tell over our glares and critisims. its sad on how we could say such things behind our backs. suffocating our every gasp for air, killing us without us knowing. its such a mystery on how we could walk bear foot on the rocky road ahead and yet not feel anything. is just friendship itself? or is it just us?

just to voice out every word left out

Each tear drop had a sentence to say, a sentence coming from my letter for you. Should I take the courage and say it all now? Or will I just wait for the last dying day I have. To touch your hand and hold it was somewhat a dare for me as always. To hug you was the goal of the year and yet I lost my chance once we lost the friendship. But did we really lose that friendship? Or are we just lost in a path we didn’t have to take but we took anyway? I think it was I who led you to the unknown and an unknown yet found would explain each reason unspoken. How can a reason explain every reason set on the table, when every reason should be known? How can a reason not have its meaning once sitting right in front of you? Full of meaning and full of words to voice out yet it sunk into the depths of the sea. But now that each tear drop rolls down my cheek, let me just tell you this. One tear drop adds to the words you thought you would never hear. Another would the mistake of wiping away and another is just one more “I miss you” left unsaid.

a day in the life of a sopho on the dot and many more

Should I even care that something like this is waiting to happen? Or should I just show it like it is? I don’t mind going with the second choice, actually it’s not a choice, its just how I really am. Haha! Caring for what others think of me never really crossed my path, unless it’s someone who matters! Well, they don’t so why should I start now, right? Anyway, moving on to the more important things I actually care about. Things would really be much more easier if I just tell everyone everything kept inside. If I can do that, then should I have done it a long time ago? When everything else was simpler and easier to say? But now that time played with the dice should I be worried that everything’s turned into a more complex sentence that no one could ever understand, not even me, who wrote every word with the ink blots on the paper. A stain would be a mistake not a word, so every word meant was written down but then in a complex way that the ones supposed to read it was confused. Should it be burned? Or not? Should it be translated to a simpler way? Or will it just lose it’s meaning? But things like these are the ones I can’t write with ink and on my notebook, its only on the tip of every finger tip wherein its supposed to crawl on every sentence voiced out and supposed to dance as the sword stabs the backs of the betrayed liars. He was never a just a character being watched through every action, he was always just a friend wished for at all times. He was supposed to be there for every memorable good or bad, but now that he’s not can I?

Big Girls Don't Cry

The smell of your skin lingers on me now....

When i found everything simpler I never thought of everything I was saying, singing. I would just hum to the melody of whispered nursery rhymes, crawl under the sheets and suck my thumb to fall asleep. Tug onto mommy's dress for my milk, cry my heart out when my ice cream falls. And bring out my puppy dog eyes for lollipop from daddy. As I stepped into the new classroom, I would always wipe away a tear and wish my mom was here to bring me. But now as my shoes evolve to another form every school year, the heels become higher every year. My bag becomes smaller and bulckier by the minute and a new haircut was snipped to each summer. Not once did I look back and cried out for mommy. As I looked at myself in the mirror I finally saw the years of childhood I skipped to. Being in a batch higher, having friends a year older, never made you think of that one year you've just skipped. Your age isn't balanced with your actions. Is that a good thing? Or bad? Is it something I'll regret? Or not? But now I know I could always go back to the little girl I used to be as I snuck into my parents room when a thunder woke me up. The little girl who would always make cards just coz daddy came home safe. That one little girl who always cried to daddy just coz someone punched my nose. Or that little girl who would always sit infron of mommy's dresser asking her to brush her hair and put clips and ribbons on her hair. That little girl who got the attention and held on til now. Are you the same little girl? whispered lips would always ask as you brush your own hair, punch back that guy who punched you. Scream at the bitches who made your life miserable.

A single tear drop never fell on your cheek coz the constant reminder on your head would always tell you how big you are now. No need to cry. But really, a little crying will help and a hug from your parents will make you fell better. And a lollipop from dad, might just do the trick. Coz even though your stuffed koala bear fell on the ground and your crying just won't stop, you're daddy's there to pick you up and by you a lollipop and mommy's there to pick up your koala bear and give it back to you. But now that you've grown. Now that you're a big girl, if your stuffed koala falls, you choose not to pick it up, you just buy your own lollipop and walk away. Let another girl get your stuffed koala, coz you know when to let go and when to walk away. This time's just the wrong time. And you just didn't know it.