Write.

Whispers of words and silent glances. The wanted stares and batting of lashes. The flirtacious grin and the want of stares. Handing out hand held moments and the unspoken words. The unheard of moments and loud smiles. The wanted warmth from the chill of the night, hopeful hearts wishing on every star in the night sky. But as the night comes as the dried up tears moved on from one eye to another. Let the silly little girl play with her dolls for as long as wants, but now that she let go and let it collect dust, it's time for me to pick it up, clean it and treat it right. If the silly girl gets mad, a tantrum will never get it back. Here's one wish upon a star longed for, and it's getting nearer every step of the way and night. Blink. Wink. Blush. Smile. Wish. Hush. Blow. A. Kiss. Mwah.

Scared. Fear. Bravery

Maybe when she feels like she wants to be murdered, it shows us that she wants to disappear. Maybe when she wants to finally just crash, she just wants to be dramatically taken away. And when she starts starving herself, maybe she just wants to feel comfortable about herself. And when she does, don't you think you should be happy for her? Coz it means that she's doing something to make herself feel better? But when she starts to stare at the floor or at nothing that's when you know there's something wrong. And when she starts to walk like a zombie and act like she doesn't exist, that's when you know she wants to not exist. And when she walks like her world's spinning around, that's when you know she's thinking of the world upside down. Because if everything's upside down, it only means that the past is present and the present never happened and will never happen. But you know that's impossible. And what you know right now doesn't matter to her because when she closes her eyes and when she just sits there and stares, that's when you know she doesn't exist in reality. Because she's one of those people that wishes she could tell them to close their eyes when she passes by just coz she doesn't wanna be seen and she doesn't wanna see them. She's that sort of girl that wishes she was never here because she doesn't know where to go when she's taken away. She's someone who doesn't feel safe.

Just so you know

Fingertips are holding on to the words I left unspoken. This girl doesn't know whatelse to do other than sulk and feel all depressed. A bloated stomach and the emptiness of it all, makes her feel like there's no one out there that could possibly help her right now. Maybe she won't talk tomorrow. As everything left inside was left on her fingertips. The confused and puzzled up lies she told herself. The feel of the warmth against the chill behind her hair. The old crap she used to believe and tell herself. Whenever you tell yourself that everything's gonna be ok,does it help? Whenever you wake up every morning to start a new day, does it feel right that you don't have the same person to talk to. How come everything now doesn't matter? Let me face the fear of closing my eyes at night and let myself dream whatever there is left to dream. So when she cries without tears, you know you don't have anything left to say to her but the question "are you ok?" and "what's wrong?" that's when she answers.. "i'm fine." But everyone knows she's not if she cries without tears. Hug? Hug.

See me as the tears start to fall out

See, as the wish upon a star gets too old? Its when you start to lose the tears to cry for that you know you're officially crazy. Its when you start to wish for more wishes and then wish for more when you don't get that one thing yet that people start to think so too. It's when you start to waste your time thinking about what could've beens instead of the present that you know you miss him. Its when you start to lie to yourself about what you feel that you know you're going way too far. Its when you start to starve that you begin to think that you're empty inside. Its when you start to tell yourself to stop missing him that you know you can move on. One more wish left upon a star for just you and nothing more. We'll see if you come back or not, and if you don't then wishes will never be the same again. So every night i'd be staring at the night sky searching for answers if you were to come or not. But if you never will then I'd have to learn and if you will...

shallow

When you think you feel like you left something behind and then you lie to yourself that you have everything you need. That even though the person you miss isn't there for you anymore you keep telling yourself that you don't need him. but then the people around you asks you "are you ok?" and then you answer no. That's when you know you really are in deep shit. but then something pulls you out and then you realize it was you all along. you know? you're that one thing you need. shallow shit.

When you think you feel like you left something behind and then you lie to yourself that you have everything you need. That even though the person you miss isn't there for you anymore you keep telling yourself that you don't need him. but then the people around you asks you "are you ok?" and then you answer no. That's when you know you really are in deep shit. but then something pulls you out and then you realize it was you all along. you know? you're that one thing you need. shallow shit.